After the excitement of meeting baby, emotions can plummet, especially when you and your partner are tired and easily overwhelmed as you move through the early weeks and months of parenting a newborn.

Give each other time and space. Both of you are on a steep learning curve.

Each baby comes with their own set of unique needs and a personality already in the making. Create opportunities for authentic conversation where each person can express their emotions without judgment. Remember to rest when baby rests, both of you, so that you do not become exhausted to the point of distress. Of course, babies wake and feed frequently, and there won’t be the type of rest you have previously been accustomed to; however, if we use the time that baby is sleeping to rest our minds and bodies, letting go of expectations around housework, visitors, and day-to-day chores, we can stay ahead of the kind of exhaustion that can lead to an emotional thicket. Each parent brings their own history to their role, including how they themselves were parented. You and your partner may be miles apart in your perception of what a baby needs and how those needs should be met. Don’t hesitate to engage the help of a therapist. Perhaps you simply need suggestions and tools for healthy communication.

As you slow your pace, resting more and doing less, remember to eat wholesome meals (how we nourish our bodies affects our ability to cope), get some gentle exercise each day (this helps to increase dopamine and regulate postnatal hormones), and most importantly, be kind to one another as you express yourself with gentleness and respect.

Trust in your ability to bring your baby into the world,
Lenore Kilmartin